Attraction, Rather Than Promotion

Many of the most successful fellowships supporting those with addictions, obsessions or compulsions operate off of the principle of attraction rather than promotion regarding those outside the four walls of the meeting.  No one is supposed to be out in the community at large "evangelizing" on behalf of AA, NA or any of the other numerous Twelve Step-based programs (I'm only addressing those types of programs here, although as an aside I readily acknowledge that many other successful programs of recovery exist). This idea is based on the eleventh tradition as authored in the early years of Alcoholics Anonymous. Today I’d like to dive into some of the reasons why this is the rule and some of the strengths of this “policy.”

The things about a choice-based lifestyle change (positive change, obviously) is that a person has to want to do it for reasons that will genuinely make it stick. “The right reasons” don’t often coincide with advertisement or solicitation, (or court order for that matter) although they can and sometimes do. When a person has come to a turning point they are typically looking for hope, support and the chance to grow. All of these things can be found in recovery fellowships if they are healthy, and that should be evident in the everyday lives of the members of the fellowship. Good sobriety typically begets maturity, understanding and serenity and these qualities are pretty attractive when lived out.

There are a good many groups who could learn a thing or two from the practical application of this idea of attraction rather than promotion. It’s based on not just having a “thing” that people are seeking, but having members who are more engrossed by living out the principles of the group than trying to win the crowd. It’s “I am who I am, and if you like who I am, I can tell you a bit about how I got to be this way if you ask.”

There’s not supposed to be the constant attempt to publicly spoon-feed anyone anything if individual members are honoring this tradition. No advertising or promoting is needed because those who are actively living this way of life have something good that is also contagious. If you hear something that resonates and you want to give that way of life a shot, there’s a pretty clear path forward - you keep coming back. If not, maybe you don’t; the fact is that the ones who are in need and ready to change tend to find their way back sooner rather than later.

No one needs to rent billboard space to say “Come see what all the fuss is about!” If you are ready, you seek and then you find that which you sought.